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Game of Thrones Season 5 Episode 6 : Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken | Spoiler-coated Review

THE POST CONTAINS SPOILERS!!!

Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken is the title that episode 6 bears! We thought we were sure about one thing that, it is going to be a prolonged trip to the Dorne. The spoilers released by HBO, few episodes ago had this line, “Sand Snakes Attack”, which raised our excitement level to the core. But the Sand Snakes were a complete fail. Just know this much and we will talk about this in the later part of this episode review.

Spongebath For Dead People

We had our reasons for loving this show, but this is just plain creepy. Nevertheless our girl does the job impeccably. To the teeth. Also she looks, after a very long time, CLEAN and pretty. Her ‘rival’ the other girl, is still picking on her. Its clear that she is older or has spent more time in The House of Black and White than Arya. So she has an edge over her in all things. Lying included. Damn shes an awesome liar. Jaquen Hgar gives her the tough love.

``A girl is not ready to become no one, but she is ready to become someone else``

– Jaqen H’ghar

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Training is turning out to be more tedious than fun. Seems like Arya is has the worst internship in this world.

Where's Your Daddy?

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Both of our travelers are tired and hungry. To top it off, one of them is slowly dying. Our friendzoned knight must really be losing his wits. He should have interrogated Tyrion if not for Danny’s sake at least to catch up on whats going on in Westeros. The news of his father’s death hit him hard. Whatever he was, he was still a son who lost his father. Grief is a natural reaction. Of course since D&D have no other important plots to show, i’m guessing we will see Jorah go through all 5 phases of grief. Denial, anger etc etc. But the Imp makes some point here. What is Jorah getting by helping the crazy Targaryen girl conquer Westeros and what happens after she does conquer Westeros?

The Hall/Pillars of Faces

Arya, you sweet little psychopath. Finally the training is paying off. We see a faceless Star(k) in the making. Oh and what a marvelous one she will be. The way she picks up the lying, could not have been any better. Hell her performance was so good that Jaquen Hghar decided to jump her up a grade, figuratively. Dark stairs, leading to Gods know where, are always exciting. But what we actually see at the end was something that we did NOT see coming.

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Those pillars or whatever they are, finally solved the mystery of the faceless men. There are just so many faces, literally. I wonder, what if you want the one that’s really high up? Anyway, welcome to the hall of faces! Skin changers my arse, we got a face changing stark and she just got bumped up to level 99. Also if any of you fans have seen the leaked images months before the episodes we know now where Arya’s new look comes from.

The Imp's still got it!

One of the things we love about Tyrion is his fourfold thinking. Agreed thats not always the case but he’s as reasonable as he is clever. His arguments more valid than any of the current dumbf**ks’ claim to the Iron Throne. Time and again he’s made us question things we never thought twice about. And again he strikes. Questioning Daenerys and indirectly Jorah. Our friendzoned knight although defends her honor valiantly he cannot answer all the questions.

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This Q&A is cut short by some well mannered and nicely dressed pirates/slavers who by the way are also exceptionally fluent in speaking English. Tyrion scared shitless was new for us. Never see him that freaked out. It was obvious though, no one in Essos gave a “shit about Tywin” (pun intended :D) Lannister and his legacy. Hence there was no point in using the usual Lannister trick here. But what follows later brings the biggest smile on our faces. Not only did he save his own skin but also managed to keep Jorah close and get passage to their destination all in one stroke. Again remember those images of Tyrion sitting with Daenerys and Hizdar-zo-loraq in the fighting pits.

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Thats right. They are called teasers for a reason.

The Mockingbird lands in the Nest

Petyr Baelish is back in King’s Landing at the Queen mother’s behest. His welcoming party, Lancel Lannister and the sparrows, is a nice surprise. But he proves us yet again that the twisted bastard he is, he can literally talk his way out of any situation.

Just when we thought he could not get any more cunning he paints a ghastly picture, dupes the queen and gets himself a sweet deal for dominion over The North. *super-massive-giga-ultra facepalm* I mean how stupid can one be to grant so much power to someone like THAT. Cersei you are losing it woman.

Rescuing the Little Lioness from the Vipers

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Down south in Dorne, new love is shown budding quite fiercely. But that’s how teenagers are, they fight they break up, they kiss they make up. Sorry for that (-_-). Contrary to public opinion, Prince Doran is the Real Viper. You may not see it yet but I urge you to pay attention when he speaks. D&D do love leaving Easter Eggs. Aero Hotah, the big guy with an even bigger axe, shows promise of some badass Norvoshi action.

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Bronn and Jaime are cool. But Bronn and Tyrion are cooler still. Nevertheless the duo successfully infiltrate Dorne, the Watergardens basically. The Sand Snakes and Ellaria are out for revenge of Oberyn’s death. What’s new here is that they finally have a plan and are acting on it. What is it you say? Kidnapping Myrcella Baratheon and starting a war with the Lannisters or the Throne. Foolproof plan. Nothing can stop it. Except a big guy with an axe. How about we throw in the Kingslayer as well? Fret not, we still see the sand snakes in action.

Nymeria with her double daggers, Tyene with her whip and Obara with her spear. They truly are Oberyn’s daughters. Bronn and Jaime both have a hard time fighting them. We see Ellaria arrested and Sand Snakes dropping weapons (after mumbling out some pointless lines and desperately trying to look like Michelle Rodriguez) “I am Obara Sand and Oberyn’s daughter… blah blah”. Had Aero not intervened who knows how the fight would’ve turned out. We don’t see him in action but that swing of his really Longaxe was more than enough to let us know that the dude doesn’t mess around.

The Queen of Thorns

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Back in Kings Landing our favorite (Joff killer) grandmother is back. The Queen of Thorns, Lady Olenna Tyrell. What did you expect? Her grandson and heir to the Highgardens is imprisoned by some religious fanatics. Cersei, at least, handles this well. She has Loras by the balls, and she uses this nicely to coerce Lady Olenna to continue the Tyrell-Lannister alliance. Surprise is an understatement.

“Surprise Motherf**ker!”

Yeah, that’s more like it. With the help of that squire and the High Sparrow, she not only maintains to keep Loras in her grasp but also pulls Margaery in. Freaking awesome, right? Well, not so much for our newly wed Queen; but you have to appreciate the way Cersei played the ‘Game’. The hearing was rigged very well, not as good as Tyrion’s but surely it comes in as a close second though. After all she crushed two ‘Roses’ with a single ‘roar’. Again forgive my bad puns. Our King Tommen is as useful as a fly on a shit.


Bowed, Bent, TAKEN!

In the North things are as grim as one would hope. Myranda, the kennel masters daughter tries very admirably to scare the shit outta Sansa but, and I can believe I’m saying this, thanks to Peytr Baelish our dear Sansa has grown a pair. She not only puts Myranda in her place but also Theon.

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A proper northern wedding. Oh how much we’ve longed to see one. The old way, the Northern way. This wedding is just plain wrong but still we have to admit Sansa’s dress would make many girls go gaga. Traditions are important after all. Speaking of traditions, were you glad there wasn’t a bedding ceremony? Well here comes another surprise.

And this isn’t a good one. That sadistic f**k of a lord makes Reek watch him take Sansa’s virginity. Take her virginity? That’s putting it mildly. Raping his wife is more like it. This scene was definitely not needed here. I mean, has Sansa not suffered enough already? The Red Wedding was shocking and left the fans mourn over for years, the Purple Wedding was pleasant to watch though. But this one, as the fans call it the “#Blackwedding” won’t be forgotten soon enough. That helpless expression on Reek’s face definitely matched with that on all our faces.


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Syk

Software Engineer at Cap Gemini
Software Engineer. Flick Freak. Avid Reader. ASOIaF enthusiast. Budding writer. One who makes the crowd and credits the same.

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