Game of Thrones Season 5 Episode 5 : Kill the Boy | Spoiler-coated Review

Thank the Gods GreyWorm is alive…. Wait. No, no, nooo. Ser Barristan. Just when it feels like someone has an important part to play. I can’t even say i’m surprised. Killing Ser Barristan on the shows was one of the many blow backs GRRM said the readers would suffer watching the show. Now that he is definitely DEAD. And there’s no priestesses, blood magic to bring him back from the dead; Readers are now the defensive. This was a warning. The show CAN spoil the books. F**k*ng producers.

Queen Daenerys’ loss is portrayed marvelously by Emilia. Greif can lead a person to make hasty decisions. Or in this case Fiery. Sorry about the bad pun but you just can’t resist it. More Dragons please!!! At this point I don’t care if they eat each other as long as we get to see them in action. Did you see those eyes? Those horns. The scales. The noblemen of Mereen are nowhere enthralling. Our beloved Khaleesi on the other hand has kept things gripping.

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The episode is named ‘Kill the Boy’, now honestly answer me this; How many of you thought this had something to do with Olly? Especially in the lord Commander’s chambers.  Come now, no need to be embarrassed. The producers and GRRM together make the list of most twisted and sick people on this planet. Its alright if you got caught up in it.

Maester Aemon as wise as he is helpless. All he can do is pray to the gods for the last surviving Targaeryn. Danaerys He cannot help, but Jon snow is an entirely different story.

*Goosebumps*. Aaah! The alliance. Wilidings and the Nights Watch. Nothing good can come of it, to quote Jon snow, when half the men in the nights watch hate you’. But still episode 8 – Hardhome will be something of a surprise. You have been warned.  In the midst of this chaos, we see Stannis being a Grammar Nazi. A king must be well read, of course. Fewer, he says to the correct the misuse of the word ‘less’.

Brienne. I have no words. Still keeping the oath which nobody expects her to. Hasn’t done anything useful apart from killing the Hound and losing both of the Stark girls as soon as she found them. But I have to admit it, she plays this honesty card too well.

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Ramsay. Sadistic and f**ked up as ever. Myranda, now there’s someone to lookout for. I’m willing to bet she dies a horrible death somewhere in this season. Speaking of people to lookout, that old woman is my new favourite character. We see the reunion of Sansa and Theon, good to know Sansa can hold a grudge. The North remembers. Reek, he’s still Ramsay’s bitch. We all hoped he would spill out to Sansa that he didn’t kill Bran and Rickon, but all we get is a lame ass apology and more of Ramsay’s misogynistic shit.

Lord Bolton bitch-slaps his bastard for the same, figuratively of course. But hell, we all enjoyed it. But our joy is short lived. Nothing good lasts forever, or for more than a minute in our case. And then we see where Ramsay gets his genes from. A sick, rapist father. No surprise there, the Apple doesn’t fall from the tree.

“The north is ours yours and mine”, says Roose Bolton.

But I say, “ The north knows no other king than whose name is Stark.”

At the wall, Stannis is on fire. One scene after another. His popularity is growing exponentially. The attack on Winterfell is imminent. Stannis giving his fleet to Jon snow to bring the wildlings to the wall. So, does this mean its his time to die? Or we get a new favorite character? Time will tell.

Far east in Mereen, our boy greyworm gets some. The relationship we’ve all been waiting to begun has started with a sweet kiss. Missandei, is one amazing woman. Although she’s hardly 9 years old in the books, in the show she has a far more important role. And we see that again when she boosts our loving Khaleesi’s morale. Although I think her self confidence went a little too high. Opening the fighting pits(More blood, more violence) and marrying a Mereenese noble (more nuidity, I hope).

Tyrion, oh sweet tyrion. What will we do if anything happens to you. There is no other character in the entire show that could even come closer to replacing you. Alcoholic yet clever, noble yet pervert and many more countless qualities he possesses that we can never find in any other character. Along with our poor friend-zoned Jorah, the pair makes quite an entertaining one.

But the best, and I mean THE BEST part of the show, and yes this including the dragons, was the smoking ruins of Valyria. I, along with every other book reader out there was hoping to catch the glimpse of this fabled city in the shows. And here it is. Just as we imagined, ghastly yet marvelous. To top it off, Tyrion recites the story of the Doom of Valyria.

Just when we thought it couldn’t get any better, Dragon. Hee..haw..haw..haw. Drogon looks beautiful, scarlett-jade-orange-yellow-red and black plus. Words cannot begin to describe that gorgeous creature. Tyrion to stares in stunned silence. And then come the Stone men of Valyria. One treat after another. But as I mentioned above, our joy on the show is always short lived. It’s hardly a minute later that we see the forecast of Jorah’s death. Well played producers and screenplay writers, well played.

Well that’s it for this episode, in the next installment of GOT we see Arya training. Jorah and Tyrion running into slavers. Trystane and Myrcella making plans. Jaime and Bronn reaching their destination. And, wait for it…….. The Sand Snakes’ attack.

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